What not to wear & GwennieBee

My latest problem is what to wear to work.

Lots of people were away in July and August, so I could get by with sundresses, capri pants and tee shirts. But now that it is September and more meetings with donors, I need to be less casual and more professional. I had a meeting at Tufts University with the legal team and planned on wearing my tan linen suit. Well, that morning I went to get dressed and I looked like a little kid playing dress up in their mom's closet.

Fortunately, I had ordered 3 pairs of pants from Talbots 2 weeks ago, so I pulled those out. When the pants arrived in the mail, I tried then on and they were a tinsy bit snug. Not really tight, but just that place where if  gained 5 lbs, they would have been too tight. Pre-surgery me would never had kept them. I tend to like clothes on the loose side -- all the better to hide in. And pre-surgery me would always be thinking, "well, if I gain..." I really had to tell myself, "you're not going to gain, you are going to lose, keep the pants." So, I kept them. Having faith in the fact I will keep losing, not gaining, is a complete mind shift. Yay.

So, I grabbed a pair of new pants and put the tan suit in the give-away pile. Guess what? Too big! It seems I am losing my hips. I could fit my hands inside the pants on both sides. Yay. But also Ugh.

These 3 new pants are my only pants in my closet, so I had to wear them. But all day I was like, "Shit, now I can't even wear these pants!" I made it through the week with sundresses, then went shopping yesterday. I had to try on a lot of styles and sizes, but ended up with 2 black and 1 pair. Phew. I have gone down 4 sizes since May 27. Even I can admit that's pretty amazing. :) (Though I don't feel comfortable enough sharing what the sizes are just yet, we will see if I ever get to that point.)

My shirts are also too big. Again, I tend to wear them on the bigger size, and it's hard mentally to feel comfortable going down. But I've gone down 2 sizes, and have had to buy a few shirts to get me through till we I pull out the fall sweaters. I am now wearing bras that are 6 inches smaller than I was wearing in May -- no wonder my shirts are too big!

Jen/Whitney had recommended a website where you basically "rent" clothes -- kind of like Netflix for clothes -- instead of spending money on things I'll probably only wear for 6 weeks. I looked on the site two different times, and just didn't find a lot that I liked. And with the challenge of finding the right fit for my body, I decided to go ahead and spend the money. And all summer stuff is on sale now, so all of the shirts I have bought have been super cheap, and the pants aren't too bad. I also got a couple of dresses on sale.

It seems like every 10-15lbs = the need for a size down, so I think that should take me till end of November. Which also means I am thinking I'll be at 60lbs by end of the year (originally I was thinking 50 by end of 2015, but I feel comfortable saying 60 now.) That means I should be 70 by March 1, which would be great too. (Could be more, but trying not to focus too much on the number, but more on how I feel.)

So how do I feel? I feel good. I have more energy. My allergies are much better (weird, I know.) I'm drinking tons of water, taking my vitamins, doing my weights a few nights a week. Eating is still a challenge -- well, always thinking about food is a challenge. What am I going to eat? What do I need to bring with me? What are they going to have? What do I need to buy? Those are the thoughts that occupy my mind (along with what am I going to wear, but I got that one answered for now.) I still focus primarily on protein, these days I'm eating greek yogurt with added blueberries or raspberries, shashimi, shrimp dumplings steamed, chicken, turkey breast from deli, scrambled eggs, quinoa, shrimp. But I am really trying to eat more veggies (cucumbers, zucchini) and fruit (raspberries and blueberries.) I could do better. :)